On Easter Sunday, we see two of the most prominent of Jesus' followers and what they experienced following the Resurrection. Mary Magdalene shows up at the tomb early in the morning. Finding the tomb open, she goes to find Simon Peter (see John 20:1-18).
Earlier, I focused on Mary and some of what she experienced. When all the male disciples fled, the women remained to the very end. What was it like for them showing up that morning and finding the tomb that way? What did it mean for Mary when Jesus came to her outside the tomb?
Now I turn to Peter. He promised to follow Jesus to the very end, and then he denied him three times while following along after Jesus' arrest. Realizing what he had done, Peter goes away ashamed and in tears. Three days later, what is he to make of the empty tomb?
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Earlier this morning, our primary focus was on the experience of Mary Magdalene. Mary showed up at the tomb to discover the stone rolled away. Not sure what this meant and perhaps fearing what she might find inside, she ran off to find Peter.
We know that Peter holds a special place among the apostles. The Twelve, as they are often called, were the inner circle of male disciples, the men who were closest to Jesus. But even among the Twelve, Peter, along with the brothers, James and John, held a special place. Peter is almost always present at the most important events. He is with Jesus on the mountaintop when Jesus is transfigured. Peter is present in the Garden when Jesus prays before his arrest. Peter holds a place of privilege amongst the other male disciples.
Interestingly, the argument can be made that Mary Magdalene holds a similar place of privilege among Jesus’ female followers. Whenever a list is given of the women who followed Jesus, Mary Magdalene is listed first, just as Peter is for the male followers. And so it makes a certain amount of sense that these two of Jesus’ followers figure so prominently in this first story following the crucifixion. Given this understanding, it is also no wonder that Mary would have run off to find Peter first to tell him what she had found.
Upon discovering the tomb open, Mary likely feared the worst. A recently dead body. A tomb that has been open for who knows how long. The presence of wild animals in the surrounding hills. Who would want to enter that tomb alone?
The last time we saw Peter, he had been following Jesus after his arrest. In doing so, he was recognized and called out, but three times he denied knowing Jesus. Realizing what he had done, Peter had left in shame to be alone.
So here we are, three days later, and Mary comes rushing to find Peter to tell him that the stone has been rolled away from the tomb where Jesus had been laid. Peter would have had no reason to disbelieve her. Mary had a prominent place among Jesus’ followers as well. She had stayed until the end. She had seen where his body was laid. She obviously came to tell him this so that he can come with her to see. So they set off for the tomb.
The other disciple that is with them is quicker to arrive at the tomb. He makes it to the tomb first, but he waits outside, perhaps afraid to enter alone just as Mary was. However, when Peter arrives, he goes straight into the tomb.
Perhaps expecting to find a gruesome sight, Peter is instead perplexed by what he finds. Jesus’ body is gone, but the linen clothes are simply lying there. To confuse matters even more, the head cloth is folded neatly and placed aside by itself. If the body had been dragged off by wild animals, surely the linen burial cloths would have been torn and dragged around as well. If someone else had come to remove the body, surely they wouldn’t have left the linens behind either.
The gospel writer tells us that they did not yet understand either the things that Jesus had told them or the things that were to be found in scripture regarding the resurrection. Perhaps they began to ponder this new information with the things that Jesus had said. We are told that the other disciple saw and believed, but Peter appears to still be lost in thought as they return to where they are staying.
Considering all that has happened, perhaps we can understand. Peter was the closest of the male disciples to Jesus. After all they had been through together, Peter likely still feels ashamed for how things ended a few days ago. Just as Jesus had said, the spirit was willing but the flesh was weak. Peter could not in fact follow Jesus to the end, to the cross.
“What if Jesus really has come back? Surely he won’t want to see me.”
At this point, Peter does not yet know the joy. He has perhaps begun to feel an inkling of hope, but it is safe to assume he also still feels the shame of his denial.
I think there are times we can identify with Peter. We get hung up on all the things we have done wrong, the ways in which we have fallen short. Perhaps we have had the experience of denying Jesus in some way, be it big or small. If we have denied Christ, it may be difficult to feel the joy of this day.
And yet, looking back at what Peter has experienced, perhaps we can find some joy after all. We have the benefit of knowing the whole story. We know what Peter does not. We know what comes next. But even without that knowledge, there is already enough good news here for Peter to know some hope.
At the meal they shared before Jesus was arrested, their final meal where Jesus predicted Peter’s denial, Jesus did not turn Peter away. He did not exclude him from the meal. Jesus still asked for him to be close as he prayed in the garden. In fact, Jesus didn’t even turn Judas away from their final meal together, knowing what was to come later.
To make this even more clear, the Gospel of John presents that final meal in a slightly different light from the other Gospels. Not only do they share a final meal together, but Jesus shows the disciples exactly what all his teachings mean. Jesus, their teacher and friend, the one they have been following, the one they have begun to think of as the Messiah, takes on the role of a household servant and kneels before each of the disciples to wash their feet. Knowing Peter would deny him three times before the following morning, Jesus washes his feet. Knowing Judas is the one who will betray him, Jesus washes his feet.
We can know the joy of the resurrection because Jesus comes to us even if we have denied him. Jesus comes to us even if we have betrayed him.
I think this is the reason that Peter needs to go home to ponder these things. What if all those things that Jesus said are true? If the one we followed as the Messiah died on the cross, was it all meaningless? But if he really is back, what does that mean for us? If the one who offers us love and forgiveness even knowing the worst we have done is still alive, how do we reconcile that with our own guilt?
So far, all Peter has seen is the empty tomb and linen cloths. He has not had his own encounter with Jesus. Even Mary has not yet had her own encounter following Peter’s departure. All Peter has at this moment is his guilt and his uncertainty about what the empty tomb means.
I imagine it is the same for many of us. We have our guilt and our uncertainty. We know the things we have done, the things we have left undone. We know the tomb is empty. We have the hope that the forgiveness that Jesus offers is enough.
And so, we come like the earlier disciples to see that the tomb is empty. We come to ponder what that means for not only us, but the rest of the world. We come with our guilt and our sorrow, our pain and our grief. We come to find unexpected hope, to acknowledge that joy may be possible once again.
We come to gather at the table, as Jesus gathered with his followers and friends, his chosen family. Jesus invites us to the table, knowing both what we have done as well as what we still may do. Still Jesus invites us. Still Jesus feeds us. Still Jesus offers us forgiveness and grace.
May we hear Peter’s story and know that there is hope for us and for all of those around us.
May we gather at the table, invited by the risen Christ.
May we gather together and recognize Jesus in our midst.