We always talk about "Doubting Thomas," but, in doing so, we ignore the fact that all of the male disciples were in the same boat. This week, we pick up where we left off last week. After the discovery of the empty tomb and Jesus' appearance to Mary Magdalene, a group of disciples has gathered together. We might imagine this is an opportunity for them all to talk about the stories they have heard -- the empty tomb and the further account that Mary shared after (see John 20:19-31).
And then Jesus is there among them.
How can we find good news for ourselves in the fact that the disciples grieved, lived in fear, and had doubts about the stories they wee hearing? How can we make sure that we are sharing the body of Christ with others that we might be empowered just as the disciples were?
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Happy Easter! As we continue into this season, we will see that our Scriptures make clear that the joy of the Resurrection could not be confined to one day. And so it is that our celebration of Easter is not confined to a single Sunday. Instead, Easter lasts for seven weeks. The final Sunday of Easter is the day we know as Pentecost Sunday.
Our gospel readings on Easter Sunday always focus on the discovery of the empty tomb. Whether it is Mary Magdalene alone or Mary with a group of women, Mary is always a part of the initial discovery of the empty tomb. And Peter is usually named as one of the ones to whom the empty tomb was reported. But as we continue into the season of Easter, we hear about other appearances as well.
Our story today picks up right where we left off last week. The very same day, after Mary has come to tell Peter what she has seen, after Peter and the unnamed disciple run off to see for themselves, many of the disciples gather together for a meal. Even though they have heard things from Mary and Peter and at least one other, they are still afraid. The Jewish authorities are still on the lookout for Jesus’ followers, and, other than Mary, no one else is quite sure what to think about the empty tomb.
Keeping this in mind, I want to jump ahead for just a moment. You see, I think that in general, we tend to give Thomas a bad rap. We talk about “Doubting” Thomas, even sometimes using that as a name for someone who has difficulty believing in something. But the fear of the disciples that evening, hiding behind closed doors even after, I am sure, having heard the rest of Mary’s story at this point in time, is not what we expect from a group of people who believe what they have heard.
I imagine they were even more frightened when Jesus showed up in their midst. Hence his first words to them, “Peace be with you.” But notice what happens next. “After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. When the disciples saw the Lord, they were filled with joy” (John 20: 20, CEB). They don’t believe after the stories they heard earlier in the day. They don’t believe when Jesus suddenly appears in their midst. They don’t believe after he greets them with familiar words. They believe after he has shown them his hands and his side.
And yet Thomas always gets the blame. Thomas is held up as the poster child for those with doubts. But he asked for no more than what the other disciples had already received. Sometimes I think it is more like Thomas felt left out than that he needed proof. I can almost hear him asking, “Why did Jesus appear to all of the others but not me?” Thomas wanted to be included. He wanted to have his own experience of Jesus appearing in the flesh before him.
Whether we want to continue to hold up Thomas as the paragon of all who doubt or recognize that all of the disciples had their doubts that first evening, we can’t argue with the results of their encounter with Jesus. Remember, that first appearance of Jesus in their midst was the same day that Mary had shared her incredible story, the same day that Peter had seen the empty tomb and the folded linen cloths. It may have been the third day after but it was scarcely more than 48 hours since Jesus had died on the cross. Their fear and sadness is easy to understand, as is their disbelief.
But when they saw, they were filled with joy. When Thomas saw, he proclaimed, “My Lord and my God!” They were filled with joy and energized for all that came next. Their grief and fear is wiped away. In a relatively few years, the story of Jesus spreads across the Mediterranean, into Europe and Africa and Asia. In fact, the oldest denomination in India still bears the name of the disciple credited with his missionary work there -- Mar Thoma, or Saint Thomas.
Our story of these encounters makes it clear that Jesus appeared to the disciples in the flesh. How else could they place their fingers in the marks of the nails? How else could they place a hand into the cut in his side? They had a real encounter with the body of Jesus.
As I think about this story, I am slightly embarrassed to say that there is a song that comes to mind. I have a feeling some of you may know it. It was a fairly popular song from a few years ago. It starts off, “I thought love was only true in fairy tales/Meant for someone else but not for me/Love was out to get me/That's the way it seemed/Disappointment haunted all of my dreams.”
I feel like this is a pretty good description of where the disciples are on that first Easter Sunday. They thought they understood what Jesus had been trying to tell them. They thought they understood what was coming. Jesus was the Messiah, the savior, the one who would lead the people to freedom. At least some of them were expecting Jesus to lead them in a rebellion against their oppressors. Then on Friday, love died. All they had left was disappointment and hollow dreams.
But the next part of the song, the chorus that is repeated throughout, that breaks up each moment of disappointment and disillusionment, says, “Then I saw her face, now I'm a believer/Not a trace of doubt in my mind/I'm in love/I'm a believer, I couldn't leave her if I tried.”
When the disciples saw Jesus, when they realized that even death could not stop God’s love, even if it could delay it for a little while, that is when they knew they had been following the right path. Jesus came into a world that was willing to kill him rather than admit to any other truth about God than what they already knew, and showed the world that death could not end what God offered. No more doubts. Only love and belief.
Now they understand. God's love wins out. This is the result of Jesus' focus on love, forgiveness, and healing. A few days ago, a few hours ago, a few minutes ago, they were all in despair. But now. Now they want to tell everyone they can find about Jesus. There is no turning back now.
They will have their revolution, the Messiah will lead then to freedom, but it doesn't look like anything they expected.
Instead of claiming power for themselves, instead of crushing their oppressors, they lead a different kind of rebellion...
A rebellion built on hope.
A rebellion built on love.
Filled with the Holy Spirit, they carry God’s message of love to the ends of the known world and beyond.
Where does this leave us? How often do we, like the disciples, wish Jesus would just show up and show us the scars? Would that be enough to change our grief into joy, our doubt to belief, our fear to confidence?
I am sure there are some of us who have doubts. I know I have my own from time to time. But I can rest easy in the knowledge that Jesus’ disciples all had their own doubts, and look what God did through them. That doesn’t mean things are easy; I think that is the part we have a tendency to forget. We still have doubts, we still know grief, we still live in fear. But the good news of Easter is that those things never stop God’s love for us.
We can rest in the knowledge that God’s love for us is unending, that God is willing to go through the worst parts of human life and still love us on the other end of that. And then when all is said and done, God will still take us -- imperfect, full of doubts, troubled by grief, scared -- and breathe the Holy Spirit upon us and send us out to show the rest of the world what God’s love looks like.