As we have traveled through this Easter season, I have focused on the appearances of the resurrected Jesus to his various followers, the disciples' encounters with the risen body of Christ. We've seen the female followers discover the empty tomb and Mary Magdalene's subsequent encounter with Jesus in the garden. We've seen the appearance to the inner circle of male disciples on subsequent weeks as they hid with their fears and their doubts behind locked doors. And we've seen a glimpse of how the crucifixion and resurrection affected a pair of followers that were not in the inner circle.
These encounters mostly follow a similar pattern. Jesus appears to his followers, there is some recognition of his physical presence (holding on to him, touching his wounds, sharing food), often there is a sharing of some sort of message, and then a command or impulse to share that message.
This week, we return to the group of disciples we are more familiar with (see John 21:1-19). These are members of the inner circle, the male disciples that were closest to Jesus, sometimes referred to as the Twelve. Though not all of them are present, we do find Peter, James, John, Thomas, Nathanael, and a couple of unnamed others.
Apparently they are still trying to figure out what the appearances of Jesus are supposed to mean for them. The gospel writer tells us this is the third appearance to these men, so we can guess we are at least a week out from that first Easter morning when the women discovered the empty tomb and Jesus appeared to Mary Magdalene. Later that same day, Jesus appeared to the previously unknown followers on their journey back to Emmaus, and then, that evening, Jesus appeared to his inner circle as they hid in Jerusalem; well, all of them except Thomas. A week later, he again appeared to the men and Thomas was present. So we can safely assume that this appearance follows the one that included Thomas.
Peter both impulsive and clueless as ever, decides to go fishing. While our gospel writer doesn’t go into much detail, we might guess that uncertain what else to do, Peter simply returns to things he can understand. He has fished his entire life. The sons of Zebedee were his partners. Maybe some of the other disciples had been fishermen as well. It is something they know, something they can understand.
The abruptness of the transition in the story suggests this was something Peter did kind of impulsively. He just decides to go fishing and the others sort of tag along. As something he has done his whole life, maybe it is also something he finds soothing, or something familiar he can do while he thinks. Or maybe, like some people today, he was just happy to be out on the lake with friends.
Oddly, this story made me think of Harry Potter. There is a scene in the final movie where Voldemort has just cast a killing curse on Harry, and Harry has an experience of himself in a train station talking with Dumbledore. Harry is somewhat confused by his surroundings. He probably assumes he is dead, particularly as Dumbledore had been killed some months before. And yet here they are conversing, Dumbledore offering wisdom as he often did in life. He tells Harry how proud he is of him and all he has accomplished, and then he suggests that Harry has a choice. He can move on and leave the pain of the world he had been in behind. Or he can return and finish what he had started. As you may know, Harry chooses to return to a world of uncertainty and probable pain so that he can finish the tasks that had been placed before him.
And so I imagine in this story that we find Peter in a moment of indecision. Jesus has come to them twice since he was resurrected. He has continued to teach them. And yet, Peter is at a loss. I am sure he is full of doubts in his own abilities, in continuing the ministry that Jesus started. He is probably still feeling a bit guilty after impulsively telling Jesus he would follow him to death only to deny him several times the night he was arrested. It would be so easy to move on and return to something he knows how to do, to leave some of that pain behind.
And yet, for this lifelong fisherman, we hear in the story that he and the others don’t have any luck. Maybe their hearts simply weren't in it that night. Of course, for those that have been paying attention over the last few months, you may recognize a throwback here to Peter’s call story. Back in February as we were discussing Jesus becoming manifest in the world, we heard the story of Jesus calling on Peter to take him out on the lake so he could speak to the crowds (Manifestation: Fishing with Jesus). In that story, Peter, James, and John had just had a similarly unsuccessful night on the lake. While they were packing up their nets, Jesus had asked Peter to take him out a little ways. And then after he had spoken to the crowds, he suggested Peter put his nets out again, and Peter could not bring in the haul of fish himself, it was so much. It was in that moment that Peter had recognized Jesus for who he is.
And so today, we hear the echo of this story as Jesus, who is as unknown to Peter in this moment as he was that first time, shows up and suggests they put their nets out on the other side of the boat. They catch so many fish, they fear the nets will rip. And yet Peter, as clueless as ever, fails to recognize Jesus. It is the disciple Jesus loved, whom we are told is John, who cries out, “It is the Lord!”
And then impulsive but faithful Peter throws a cloak over his naked body and jumps in the lake. He cannot wait for the boat to be rowed to shore. He can’t wait to get to Jesus. In his impulsiveness we also see the strength of his love and faith.
Once the boat finally makes it to shore and the others gather, Jesus invites them to share breakfast with him. With echoes of his other meals with them as well as the miraculous feedings of the thousands, Jesus shares bread and fish with them. This eating with the disciples following the resurrection is a recurring part of the story and an important one for us as we try to make sense of what the resurrection could mean. The food makes it clear that Jesus is there with them in the flesh. He is every bit as real as he was before the cross. He is not a ghost, not a specter of some kind. He shares food with them, just as he has always done.
After they have eaten, Jesus turns to Peter so that he can have a very direct and probably difficult conversation with him. In an echo of his three denials the night Jesus was arrested, Jesus asks Peter three times if he loves him. After each question, he gives a command - feed my lambs, take care of my sheep, feed my sheep.
Sometimes when we hear this text, I think we have a tendency to think of some sort of spiritual nourishment. After all, Peter is seen as the first leader of the church. He is appointed as the one upon whom the church is built; he is being sent forth as pastor to care for the community. But when we look at the example that Jesus has given us, both during his life and even here in this particular story, we find that the focus is not only on the spiritual. There is no dualism here between the body and the spirit that would raise one over the other. In this story Jesus offers both physical and spiritual nourishment. In his life, Jesus fed those who were physically hungry and those that were spiritually hungry. And so he calls on Peter to do the same. And for all of us that follow Christ, our call is to the same sort of ministry.
Just as Dumbledore reminded Harry that there were still tasks to be fulfilled, Jesus reminds Peter that all he had taught them has a purpose. The people still have needs. People are still hungry, hungry not only for a relationship with God, but actually physically hungry.
You see, spiritual nourishment by itself is not enough. For we are embodied creatures and our experience of the world, even our understanding of the spiritual, is mediated through these bodies we have - bodies that feel and get hungry. As a character in a novel I am currently reading said, “All we have to believe with is our senses: the tools we use to perceive the world, our sight, our touch, our memory” (Shadow Moon in Neil Gaiman, American Gods, 125). Our physical self is an important part of our encounter with Jesus.
And so we return to where we ended our time together last week - we encounter Jesus when we gather together and eat. And then we are called to offer the body of Christ to the rest of the world. Just as Peter was called on to feed the sheep that the Great Shepherd calls to, so are we as well. And not with words alone, but with physical food and physical action. Even so, this feeding may take different forms.
Sometimes our feeding of others takes on a somewhat symbolic nature, such as the times we gather together at the table during worship. We feed on the body and blood of Jesus in the bread and the cup. And we as the church offer that body and blood to all that come, to all that hear Jesus’ invitation. And sometimes we extend that feeding out as we take the bread and the cup from the table out to those who are unwillingly absent from our worshiping community - those who have been here, those that would be here, but for various reasons cannot be here.
And then at other times, the call to feed Jesus’ sheep takes on a very literal sense as we offer food to those who do not have easy or regular access to food. We share with those who are struggling, we share with those who are hungry, we share simply because they are in need. This too is part of our command to feed the sheep.
As we look to the days ahead, to our day to day lives, let us consider the ways that we might follow the call to feed those whom Jesus loves. In doing so, we must remember that this command to feed others is intimately tied to our love of Jesus. The commands that Jesus gave to Peter always followed the question of love. "Peter, do you love?" "You know I love you." "Feed my sheep."
If you love me, then you will feed others.
This is not simply about obedience to a command. We do this out of love. Blind obedience disconnected from love falls short of the relationship of the Good Shepherd to his sheep. It falls short of Jesus’ example to us in life, in death, and in the resurrection. It falls short of all that Jesus taught us about loving God and loving one another.
And at the same time, feeding the sheep is exactly one way in which we show our love for Jesus. We show our love for Jesus through praise and worship, through prayer, and through following his commands to love others. As Jesus shows us and teaches us over and over, this love of others is shown in meeting people’s physical needs.
We love our neighbor when we heal them when they are sick.
We love our neighbors when we feed them when they are hungry.
We love our neighbors when we see and act as if their well being is just as important as our own.
And when we love our neighbors, we are also loving Jesus.
So as we to our everyday lives, let us consider the ways that we show others the body of Christ, the ways in which we share our love of Jesus in meeting the physical needs of others.
Let us go forth to feed his sheep.